Hot Fuzz

Certificate: Certificate 15

Director: Edgar Wright

Release Date: 14 February 2010

Tagline: In a town where nothing much goes on, a whole lot is about to go down.

Main Cast:

Simon Pegg … Nicholas Angel

Nick Frost … PC Danny Butterman

I don’t know why I waited so long to watch this. I like Simon Pegg, but was put off by the poor reviews. Hot Fuzz is, in fact, very, very funny. I have a feeling though that people who didn’t grow up in a small country village (like I did) might not get the wonderful parody of village life. Perhaps it was those people who didn’t like it.

Nicholas Angel is almost superhuman. He is an outstanding cop in the Metropolitan Police with an amazing arrest record. However, his fellow officers don’t like the fact that he makes them look bad and he is transferred to Sandford, a very traditional rural village. His new colleagues turn a blind eye to anything and everything that goes on, but Nicholas, being a stickler for the law, cannot let anything go unpunished. When a series of fatal ‘accidents’ occur, he begins to get suspicious and becomes determined to get to the root of things.

Rating: ★★★★☆

 

Hercules

Certificate: Certificate U

Directors: Ron Clements & John Musker

Release Date: 10 October 1997

Tagline: A comedy of epic proportions.

Main Cast: (voice)

Tate Donovan … Hercules

Josh Keaton … Young Hercules

Danny DeVito … Philoctetes

James Woods … Hades

Surprisingly, I didn’t really enjoy this. It lacks the usual touch of disney magic and charm. The songs are not of the usual quality (I didn’t find any of them catchy or memorable) so perhaps that is the reason why. They’ve also made Hercules a bit of a whiney brat too.

Younger children will be fairly bored by it, so whilst it is a U certificate, I would think that the target age is around seven year olds. I also think that, unlike many other Disney films, there is no repeated viewing value.

Rating: ★★½☆☆

Horton Hears a Who!

Certificate: Certificate U

Directors: Jimmy Hayward, Steve Martino

Release Date: 21 March 2008

Tagline: After all, a person is a person, no matter how small.

Main Cast: (voice)

Jim Carrey … Horton

Steve Carell … Mayor

Carol Burnett … Kangaroo

I always liked Dr. Suess’s books but have remained doubtful if any of them could really be converted to a film. After the utterly dreadful The Cat in the Hat (2003), I understand that his widow decided to no longer give permission for live action adaptations of the books.

So, is HHAW! any good? I’m pleased to say that yes, it is. It’s made by the studio responsible for the Ice Age films, which are very good, and is very charming and engaging from the start. Obviously, the target audience is for younger children, but any fan of Dr. Suess (such as myself) would find this entertaining.

Pure, simple and innocent fun. Fantastic!

Rating: ★★★½☆

G-Force

Certificate: Certificate PG

Director: Hoyt Yeatman

Release Date: 31 July 2009

Tagline: The world needs bigger heroes.

Main Cast:

Bill Nighy … Leonard Saber

Zach Galifianakis … Ben

Sam Rockwell … Darwin (voice)

Jon Favreau … Hurley (voice)

Nicolas Cage … Speckles (voice)

G-Force has guinea pigs in it. Talking guinea pigs. That’s two stars already! I actually really liked this, and don’t know why it has such a poor rating on the IMDB. It’s fast and funny, and although the plot is slightly bizarre and formulaic, it kept me entertained. Basically, a group of guinea pig special agents discover a plot to take over the world through household appliances (I told you it was bizarre), and they have to save the day. There are some really good gadgets, and I especially liked the exercise ball cars.

Whilst not in the same league as Pixar films, G-Force is still very worth watching both for children and adults.

Rating: ★★★½☆

Up

Certificate: Certificate U

Directors: Pete Docter & Bob Peterson (co-director)

Release Date: 9 October 2009

Main Cast: (Voice)

Ed Asner … Carl Fredricksen

Jordan Nagai … Russell

Christopher Plummer … Charles Muntz

I don’t know how Pixar do it, but they have raised the bar again with this glorious film.

I’m not ashamed to admit that I cried. Three times, in fact (and twice during the first twenty minutes or so!) Watching Carl’s life unfold is both joyous and heartbreaking. And then, along comes Russell to cheer us all up!

I could write for hours about what makes Up such a work of pure genius, but I won’t. You need to discover it for yourself.

Please, please do not miss this film!

Rating: ★★★★★

Zombieland

Certificate: Certificate 15

Director: Ruben Fleischer

Release Date: 7 October 2009

Tagline: This place is so dead.

Main Cast:

Jesse Eisenberg … Columbus

Woody Harrelson … Tallahassee

Emma Stone … Wichita

Abigail Breslin … Little Rock

Zombieland is a very good spoof of zombie films, and sits quite happily alongside Shaun of the Dead in terms of quality. All of the ‘how to survive a zombie infestation’ clichés are there, and somehow they have managed to make a very funny film in a genre (spoofs) that is itself infested with mediocrity.

If you love zombie films and are familiar with the ‘rules’ of survival, then you’ll like this. And yes, sometimes only a Twinkie can hit the spot!

Rating: ★★★★☆

Batman (1966)

Certificate: Certificate U

Director: Leslie H. Martinson

Release Date: 16 December 1966

Tagline: He’s here, big as life, in a real Bat-Epic.

Main Cast:

Adam West … Bruce Wayne / Batman

Burt Ward … Dick Grayson / Robin

Lee Meriwether … Miss Kitka / Catwoman

Burgess Meredith … The Penguin

Cesar Romero … The Joker

Frank Gorshin … The Riddler

I love the dark and moody Batman. I also love the comic and camp Batman of the 1960s tv show, and this is chock full of camp ‘kerpows’ and Holy whatsits!

All the actors have a wonderful sense of comic timing, and I defy anyone to say that they don’t have a big grin when watching this (apart from the anal retentive soap dodgers who still live at home when they’re 40).

There are so many fantastic lines for all the characters, and they just keep on going the whole way through. Here are some of my favourites:-

[Batman and Robin are running to the United World Building]
Robin: Holy marathon! I’m getting a stitch, Batman!
Batman: Let’s hope that it’s a stitch in time, Robin, that saves nine – The nine members of the United World Security Council. Come on.

———-

Batman: [reading a riddle] What has yellow skin and writes?
Robin: A ball-point banana!
Batman: [reads the second riddle] What people are always in a hurry?
Robin: Rushing people… Russians!
Batman: So this means…
Robin: Someone Russian is going to slip on a banana and break their neck!
Batman: Precisely, Robin!

———-

Vice Admiral Fangschliester: – to some chap named “P. N. Guin”.
Batman: P. N. Guin…
Robin: Penguin!

———-

Holy review, Batman! It’s fabulous!

Rating: ★★★★★

Jennifer's Body

Certificate: Certificate 15

Director: Karyn Kusama

Release Date: 4 November 2009

Tagline: She’s evil… and not just high school evil.

Main Cast:

Megan Fox … Jennifer

Amanda Seyfried … Needy

Johnny Simmons … Chip

Jennifer’s Body is a surprisingly entertaining black humour with American teenagers as the central characters (that’s why it’s surprisingly entertaining!)  Basically, high school ‘Miss Popular’ Jennifer gets more than she bargained for when she got in a van with a rock band.

I have a slight niggle with the fact that she was supposed to be a succubus. Succubi don’t tear men’s throats out to draw energy, they shag them until they can take no more. However, I’d far rather watch the throat tearing, so I’ll not worry about that too much.

If you’ve seen Ginger Snaps and liked it, then you’ll like this. If you haven’t seen it – why not, it’s great?

Rating: ★★★½☆

The Hangover

Certificate: Certificate 15

Director: Todd Phillips

Release Date: 12 June 2009

Tagline: Some guys just can’t handle Vegas.

Main Cast:

Phil Wenneck … Bradley Cooper

Ed Helms … Stu Price

Zach Galifianakis … Alan Garner

Oh. My. God. I’ve seen some bloody rubbish in my life, and this is right up there with the worst of the worst. It’s supposed to be a madcap screwball comedy, but it’s so shoddily written that there are just no laughs at all. And just when you think that it couldn’t get any worse, Mike Tyson makes an appearance. He’s a very gifted actor, and I think that his true vocation is for stage and screen.

Some of the things that we are supposed to laugh at are actually very offensive, and one ‘joke’ (which is done twice) consists of Zach Galifianakis making a baby do masturbating motions when scantily clad women are around. Is it just me or does that border on paedophilia? I can’t believe that the BBFC let that pass. You are also supposed to laugh at racism, simulated bestiality, prejudice, breast feeding and fat jokes.

We are also continually reminded that Doug is missing. I assume that this is because the people who like this kind of drivel have very poor attention spans.

Unless you are an adolescent boy who finds this kind of rubbish funny, then steer well clear.

Rating: ☆☆☆☆☆

Dark Habits

Certificate: Certificate 15

Director: Pedro Almodóvar

Release Date: 31 August 1990 (UK)

Main Cast:

Cristina Sánchez Pascual … Yolanda Bel

Julieta Serrano … Abadesa Julia

Dark Habits is a completely bizarre film, and one that I think will either bore you or leave you thinking about it for a few days. I’m not sure if it’s a satire, black comedy, serious drama or even all three!

All of the nuns have very unique personalities and all have different reasons for being there. They are a very eclectic bunch!

Basically, the story is about a group of nuns who provide refuge for life’s waifs and strays. They offer no judgement on those whom they help, and with good reason.

Whilst this is not one of Almodóvar’s best films, it’s still very thought provoking and surprises you in many ways.

Rating: ★★★☆☆

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