Certificate:

Directors: Michael Spierig & Peter Spierig

Release Date: 6 January 2010

Tagline: In 2019, the most precious natural resource… Is us.

Main Cast:

Ethan Hawke … Edward Dalton

Willem Dafoe … Lionel ‘Elvis’ Cormac

Sam Neill … Charles Bromley

Another good vampire film! First we had 30 Days of Night, and then Let The Right One In. Daybreakers has a very good look and feel (Edward Dalton reminded me of Constantine – a moody, chain-smoking antihero) and it drew me in very quickly. It has just the right level of gore and humour to balance it out, and despite its grim setting it never slips over the line into pretentiousness.

I liked the story and thought that it brought something new to the genre, which is quite hard to do as we all know the ‘rules’ concerning vampires (as ludicrous as that sounds!)

Yes, there was a formulaic side to it, but it was done so well that I didn’t mind. I’d be more than happy to watch it again.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Oren Peli

Release Date: 25 November 2009

Tagline: What happens when you sleep?

Main Cast:

Katie Featherston … Katie

Micah Sloat … Micah

I was looking forward to watching this as I love suspense films. I sat there waiting for something happen, and I waited, and waited then there was an ok bit, and then I waited some more and then it ended.

The whole thing is ludicrous and very, very boring. There are so many instances of why didn’t they do this or that (the major one being not turning the lights on) that you just end up getting frustrated at the characters.

Basically, what happens is this:-

Boy follows girl with a camcorder.

We watch them sleep.

Loud noises wake them up, boy runs around with the camcorder.

And so on.

What happens when you sleep? Not much, going by this! If this scares you, then I recommend that you watch Finding Nemo. The ‘mild peril’ element will have you quaking in your boots.

Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Ruben Fleischer

Release Date: 7 October 2009

Tagline: This place is so dead.

Main Cast:

Jesse Eisenberg … Columbus

Woody Harrelson … Tallahassee

Emma Stone … Wichita

Abigail Breslin … Little Rock

Zombieland is a very good spoof of zombie films, and sits quite happily alongside Shaun of the Dead in terms of quality. All of the ‘how to survive a zombie infestation’ clichés are there, and somehow they have managed to make a very funny film in a genre (spoofs) that is itself infested with mediocrity.

If you love zombie films and are familiar with the ‘rules’ of survival, then you’ll like this. And yes, sometimes only a Twinkie can hit the spot!

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Karyn Kusama

Release Date: 4 November 2009

Tagline: She’s evil… and not just high school evil.

Main Cast:

Megan Fox … Jennifer

Amanda Seyfried … Needy

Johnny Simmons … Chip

Jennifer’s Body is a surprisingly entertaining black humour with American teenagers as the central characters (that’s why it’s surprisingly entertaining!)  Basically, high school ‘Miss Popular’ Jennifer gets more than she bargained for when she got in a van with a rock band.

I have a slight niggle with the fact that she was supposed to be a succubus. Succubi don’t tear men’s throats out to draw energy, they shag them until they can take no more. However, I’d far rather watch the throat tearing, so I’ll not worry about that too much.

If you’ve seen Ginger Snaps and liked it, then you’ll like this. If you haven’t seen it – why not, it’s great?

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Directors: Neill Blomkamp and Simon Hansen

Release Date: 4 September 2009

Tagline: You are not welcome here.

Main Cast:

Sharlto Copley … Wikus Van De Merwe

Jason Cope … Grey Bradnam – UKNR Chief Correspondent

I heard good things about this film, but wondered why at the start. It all seemed a bit silly and ridiculous, but when it gets going it’s really, really good. Easily one of the best sci-fi films in recent years.

There’s really only one thing I can say.

I saw the Prawns, and the Prawns were good.

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Glenn Standring

Release Date: 16 August 2007

Tagline: Humans and vampires have lived in harmony… Until now.

Main Cast:

Dougray Scott … Brother Silas

Saffron Burrows … Lily

Leo Gregory … Brother Edgar

This should have been ‘right up my street’, but it wasn’t. It’s very visually stunning with clever use of colour, but the look of the film is its best quality. For some reason I found that it couldn’t hold my attention. It has a strange and completely bereft of emotion love story element and in some cases is just plain pretentious. I also found the mix of  Dickensian and the 1960’s somewhat silly.

I really should have liked this, and it’s a shame that I didn’t.

Rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Todd Phillips

Release Date: 12 June 2009

Tagline: Some guys just can’t handle Vegas.

Main Cast:

Phil Wenneck … Bradley Cooper

Ed Helms … Stu Price

Zach Galifianakis … Alan Garner

Oh. My. God. I’ve seen some bloody rubbish in my life, and this is right up there with the worst of the worst. It’s supposed to be a madcap screwball comedy, but it’s so shoddily written that there are just no laughs at all. And just when you think that it couldn’t get any worse, Mike Tyson makes an appearance. He’s a very gifted actor, and I think that his true vocation is for stage and screen.

Some of the things that we are supposed to laugh at are actually very offensive, and one ‘joke’ (which is done twice) consists of Zach Galifianakis making a baby do masturbating motions when scantily clad women are around. Is it just me or does that border on paedophilia? I can’t believe that the BBFC let that pass. You are also supposed to laugh at racism, simulated bestiality, prejudice, breast feeding and fat jokes.

We are also continually reminded that Doug is missing. I assume that this is because the people who like this kind of drivel have very poor attention spans.

Unless you are an adolescent boy who finds this kind of rubbish funny, then steer well clear.

Rating: 0 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Kathryn Bigelow

Release Date: 28 August 2009

Tagline: You’ll know when you’re in it.

Main Cast:

Jeremy Renner … SSgt. William James

Anthony Mackie … Sgt. JT Sanborn

Brian Geraghty … Spc. Owen Eldridge

I am at a loss as to why this film has been rated quite highly by film critics. I found it tedious and predictable and I didn’t find one single character in it that I liked and rooted for. Do US soldiers really behave like total twats, or are these characters  just stereotypical for this genre of film.

I will be more than happy if I never see this again.

Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Duncan Jones

Release Date: 17 July 2009

Tagline: The last place you’d ever expect to find yourself.

Main Cast:

Sam Rockwell … Sam Bell

Kevin Spacey … GERTY (voice)

Borrowing heavily from 2001: A Space Odyssey both visually and in style, Moon is a slow paced sci-fi film that unfolds gently, but never leaves you bored. It centres around a mining station on Earth’s Moon which is run by one man and an intelligent computer (think HAL from the above).  Sam’s three year contract has come to an end, and he prepares to leave for home. Unfortunately, he has an accident that prevents him from doing so.

Very simple, and very entertaining. If, however, you like your sci-fi fast paced and filled with action, then this is probably not for you.

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Certificate:

Director: Pedro Almodóvar

Release Date: 31 August 1990 (UK)

Main Cast:

Cristina Sánchez Pascual … Yolanda Bel

Julieta Serrano … Abadesa Julia

Dark Habits is a completely bizarre film, and one that I think will either bore you or leave you thinking about it for a few days. I’m not sure if it’s a satire, black comedy, serious drama or even all three!

All of the nuns have very unique personalities and all have different reasons for being there. They are a very eclectic bunch!

Basically, the story is about a group of nuns who provide refuge for life’s waifs and strays. They offer no judgement on those whom they help, and with good reason.

Whilst this is not one of Almodóvar’s best films, it’s still very thought provoking and surprises you in many ways.

Rating: 3 out of 5 stars